Nowt funnier than folk

Yesterday in search of a background noise while I endeavoured to learn a technique in Paint Shop Pro I switched to BBC America. I like talk not music so I thought they have so many rubbish programs this would be ideal. The guide showed that "Love me Love my Dolls" was just starting. Oh great! I like dolls especially art dolls. To put it mildly this was not what it was all about. These were life size, anatomically correct silicone dolls with movable joints; very anatomically correct. The dolls were loved, take that with all the meanings the word "love" conjectures and you have the picture. It was what I call jaw dropper show. So this 60 minutes did not increase my knowledge or experience of PSP.

The next offering was about young women who want to get on page 3 of the British tabloids. This is the page for topless girls to strut their stuff. So that would be OK program for background yes?, i would certainly not be distracted by young hopefuls flashing boobs. The problem was the BBC had erased, rather crudely, their nipples. They all looked like they had breast reconstruction following a mastectomy. As I sat there thinking the show was about mastectomized breasts, I got it, by then the Beeb had switched to pole dancers seeking implants. So off to see Mr Boob, a surgeon, with a distinctively Peter Sellars accent, in the comapny of Satisfied Customer and a small boobed nymph. The surgeon, Mr. Singh, laid out a variety of different sized implants for the young nymph to decide which to have installed, in the hope of furthering her pole dancing career. The announcer was quite witty in fact he kept making up rhymes to explain the situation. So this was getting entertaining, whit, sarcasm and subtler asides forget PSP. Then, and this will flabbergast my comrades of mastectomy and reconstruction, Mr Singh stated he had size 1,000 cc implants!!!!!!!! They were part silicone and part saline. The satisfied customer, the pole dancer, who is 5 ft tall had them and is known as having the biggest boobs in England. I mean water melons. Say no more.

Her implants were construted with two types of fill and she had a port for adding and subtracting saline. So when she danced at the club she filled em up and emptied them before she went home!!!! Well the saline bit. That knocked my socks off. I was dissappointed that they were not shown inflated and deflated. This could send the American Academy of Plastic surgery into a furor or warnings and dire predictions
So much for PSP and a host of jewelry making projects.

Oh, she was a very together young women and would never fit the victim image that do gooders seem to want to label these girls. She and the others were very business savvy.

I think the letters BBC are acronyms for boob, bums and c******. Just look at their line up. And impartiality in the news department HA!!!!

The title to this piece is an old Lancashire saying that my Dad like to quote.


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